CHRISTIE TELLS FAT GENERAL "LOSE WEIGHT"
MUST SHED EXTRA POUNDS IN 90 DAYS, SAYS
ROTUND NEW JERSEY GOVERNOR - ADJUTANT
GENERAL OF STATE NATIONAL GUARD LOOKS
LIKE "PORKY PIG" - SKIPPED WEIGH-INS FOR YEARS
MICHAEL CUNNIFF GROSSLY OBESE - EVEN MAKES
HIS BOSS "LOOK SLIM" IN COMPARISON - CUNIFF
AND HIS CRONIES NEED TO GO, SAYS TROOPS

© 2015 MilitaryCorruption.com

BRIG GEN MICHAEL CUNNIFFFat chance of this happening.

We mean the grossly obese adjutant general of the New Jersey National Guard losing much of his massive girth in the next 90 days.

But that's the deadline rotund Gov. Chris Christie has set for his political pal to shed the blubber.

F.O.I.A. EXPOSES GROSSLY FAT GENERAL

Thanks to the Washington POST and their top-notch military writer Craig Whitlock, we know that Air Force Gen. Michael Cunniff somehow skipped out on annual weigh-ins between 2010 and 2013. And when the "Porky Pig" lookalike finally made it onto the scales, he flunked his test by a mile.

Internal documents revealed the boss of the Jersey Guard, who had penalized subordinates for being wide around the middle, was himself 4.5 inches beyond the allowable limit..

Guard members we've talked to say Cunniff is the only person in Chris Christie's cabinet who outweighs the governor and actually makes him "look slim in comparison."

CUNNIFF BRINGS TO MIND "FAT-MAN" GERARD

For years, members of both the Army and Air National Guard in the Garden State dared not whisper that their commander was a sloppy, fat pig who didn't just have a couple "chins" - like a previous Guard boss (more on the infamous "Pillsbury Doughman", Francis R Gerard, later) - but Cunniff's whole neck looked like a compressed accordion, stuck between his head and stubby torso.

It's a hell of a thing when Guard members are held to one standard while everyone knows the fat slob in BDU's gets away with being a hog because the governor himself waddles around due to his huge waistline.

New Jersey has a precedent for this.

GERARD AND SYCOPHANT "CORKY" LOWE

Some 20 years ago, a fat despot - Air Guard Maj. Gen. Francis R. Gerard - ruled his troops with an iron fist. Like Cunniff, he was short, fat, and extremely dangerous. Anyone that aroused his ire were cut down without mercy. He cultivated lackeys like William "Corky" Lowe, the most obsequious boot-licker we ever had the misfortune to know.

Fat man Gerard is now is the cemetery pushing up daisies, and his fawning PR-man retired. Both are hardly missed by those who suffered under their unpleasant reign.

We urge all our readers to check out today's related stories box. When you get done, you will see the more some things change with the passage of time, the more they stay the same.

At least in the New Jersey National Guard.

 

RELATED STORIES
TIME TO "SET THE RECORD STRAIGHT" - HOW A
FAT EGOMANIAC ("THE PILLSBURY DOUGHMAN")
HURT THE NEW JERSEY NATIONAL GUARD - GEN.
FRANCIS GERARD'S NAPOLEONIC-COMPLEX GAVE
THE GARDEN STATE EIGHT YEARS OF MIS-MANAGE-
MENT AND DECLINE - ENLISTMENTS DOWN AND
ARMORIES CLOSED - MORALE LOW AS COTERIE
OF SYCOPHANTS FED GERARD'S MASSIVE EGO
VICIOUS BACK-STABBER A "CARTOON-LIKE"
CHARACTER - IGNORED CORRUPTION AT HQTRS